RAISING A DISTINCT CHILD

Parenting generally is not an easy task not to talk of raising a child that is distinct, responsible and secure. To do this, parents need a lot of prayers, dedication and discipline in view of a rapidly changing world full of over-extended schedules, unethical messages, and ceaseless peer-pressure.

In raising a distinct child, parents should exercise huge influence over their child’s development because after the child starts school, they cease to be the only influences so it's particularly imperative that parents give the child a good start. It is also very important to recognise that the child came into the world with his own temperaments, and it is the parents' job to provide an interface with the world that eventually prepares a child for complete independence.

Parenting is the ultimate long-term investment so we should prepare to put far more into it than we get out of it, at least for a while. In the long run, it is the most rewarding job of our lives as we see it in this part of the world. Parents’ greatest yearning is to raise a child who can face anything with wisdom and confidence and also know the importance of doing God's will at all times and not the world's. No matter what religion you practice you need the help of God.

To raise a distinct child, parents most put parenting first. This is very hard to do in a world with so many competing demands, insecurity and economic pressure. Despite all these we must make a conscious effort to plan and devote time to the child. Developing the child’s character should be a top priority. Parents should teach and pass on values as well as communicate and sustain ideas and morals that will mould him throughout his life. Parents have to learn to put their priorities below the child’s and make the sacrifice to spend more of their time caring for the child than they do to themselves. Of course, this does not mean that they should neglect themselves completely, but they should get accustomed to the idea of putting the child's needs first.

To raise a distinct child, parents should make a mindful effort to stay involved in the life of the child. Though it takes a lot of effort and strength to be there all the time but this is key in encouraging the child to develop his own interests and character. Staying involved does not mean the parents have to follow him around all day long it just means they encourage the child to talk and express himself, learn to admire and listen to him. Influencing a child’s life is one of the greatest things parent can do. It is so easy to put off a child and miss an opportunity for meaningful guidance. If you never listen to your child and spend all of your time barking orders at him (this was common in the past), he will not feel treasure or cared for.

Encourage him to be independent by letting him explore his interests like choosing his extra curricular activity in school or the cartoon he likes to watch. The parents also have to be involved by assisting with his home work, know the teacher’s name as well as some of his classmates and all of the little moments, from attending some of the school functions like open day, PTA meetings to end of session activities as well as the family time

In doing all or some of these, the parents are giving the child a robust and strong support system that enables him to build his own identity and more likely prepare him to think for himself when he becomes an adult.

One cannot underestimate the place of discipline in raising a distinct and responsible child in the society. Because discipline has been relegated to the background we see all sorts of unimaginable things happening around the world. These are the consequences of lack of values in the home these days. We have neglected who we were we now to become who the world wants us to be.

Parents should know that a child needs restrictions and should also know that a child will occasionally or consistently ignore these restrictions. A child must know that there are consequences for his actions therefore, reasonable, not violent punishments should be one of the ways to make him learn. Punishments must be applied to the erring child in such a way that he will understand what the punishment is for and know that the parent means well.

In order to raise a clear-cut, well-rounded child, parents need cognitive tools to adjust unwanted behaviours. Parents should also be aware of the fact that good behaviours should also attract rewards.

In order to raise a clear-cut, well-rounded child, parents need cognitive tools to adjust unwanted behaviours. Parents should also be aware of the fact that good behaviours should also attract rewards. Rewarding a child is also as important as punishing the child for bad behaviour. Letting the child know when he does something right will encourage the behaviour in the future. Do not let the behaviour go unnoticed.

Parents should also provide orders and consistency to discipline a child effectively. They should be able to explain their corrective methods to the child so that he can recognise them. In order words, they should not just provide restrictions without explaining why he should not do certain things. Making a connection between a child’s actions and what they mean will help him to understand why there are limits.

A child can be more intelligent and a lot smarter than the parents realise. He may sometimes sees why he should become hypocritical and as such behaves differently from his parents. In view of this, parents should endeavour to exhibit a very strong moral foundation in their own lives in other to successfully teach a child to be responsible, honourable and decent in life. They cannot avoid to being an example so being a good one the most important job.

Parents should make an effort to know what the child is absorbing. Much of what they take in as to do with moral values and characters. They should control what he watches on the TV, the books he reads and the type of company he keeps. Encourage him to bring his friends home so that you can know their characters and s also seek to meet the parents of child’s friends in order to establish if the child is safe in their houses.

I am sure no one will dispute that raising a child that is of good character demands time and effort. Having a child may be doing what comes naturally but being good parents is much more demanding and complicated because the world we live in now.